CREATED FOR CONNECTION

God Created us for Connection

God created us for connection. In fact, all people are hard-wired to connect with others, which has also been proven by science. Did you know that humans are the only species to have neural structures in our brains that allow us to engage socially and emotionally as we do? Connection is a basic human need, and mental health research shows the tragic outcomes that occur when we don’t have it.

Brain scans show that parts of a child’s brain experience significant developmental deficits when they are not regularly nurtured before four years old. This often creates surmountable consequences for the child as they grow and can lead to negative mental, emotional, physical, and behavioral health outcomes that include addiction, incarceration, homelessness, suicide, teen pregnancy, gang activity, diabetes, cancer, obesity, and early death to name a few.

The good news is that God created our brain to be able to change as new neural pathways are strengthened, and those used less frequently become weak and eventually die. So, for example, if a child is often emotionally neglected in their early years, but then develops a relationship with a mentor who connects with them regularly, nurtures them emotionally, and is a nonjudgmental, loving presence in their life, those neural pathways that were created from neglect can eventually die off, and new pathways can be created. Imagine a grown-up field of tall grass that you go to every day for several weeks and walk down the same path. At first, it may seem like nothing is happening because as you walk, the grass comes right back up, but over time it begins to lay down, and then one day, a defined path that you can clearly see develops. What would happen if you stopped going to the field and walking down the path? Of course, it would eventually grow back up. This is the same thing that happens in our brains. Our presence, or lack thereof, in people’s lives – just like in the field, will make a lasting impact. It may seem like it’s taking a long time with hard work, and you don’t see results, but with time, the seeds you have sown with your relational commitment will take root and bear fruit. Ultimately, when you are living out the second greatest commandment to “love your neighbor as you love yourself”, you are changing the brains of people and preventing so many issues that we see in our world today.

As Dr. Bruce Perry says, “Relationships are the agents of change, and the most powerful therapy is human love.”